Nothing ][

Dear Friends and Family,

Sometimes Martin Gore in his twisted world seems to know me better than anyone.

Sitting target
Sitting waiting
Anticipating
Nothing
Nothing

Life
Is full of surprises
It advertises
Nothing
Nothing

What am I trying to do
What am I trying to say
I'm not trying to tell you anything
You didn't know
When you woke up today

Sitting target
Sitting praying
God is saying
Nothing
Nothing

Always
Knows the prospects
Learn to expect
Nothing
Nothing

As we continue to wait for news, sometimes I'm full of hope and sometimes I'm filled with fear and sometimes I'm drained and just waiting and that's when I sink into Martin's world.

Let's hope the weekend brings good news.


Cheers!
mouse

Girlfriends

Dear Friends and Family,

I had a job once for a very short period of time - six months. A former manager called me to say he had a fabulous opportunity that was perfect for me. I decided to take him up on the offer.

I found a three ring circus with a mad scientist as the ringleader. After six months of living in a Dalian Alice in Wonderland, I decided to find new work. But, in those six months I found several friends for life. There's Trixie and G and Frenchie and Ms. Jordan and so many others.

And, that's why I believe that things happen for a reason and even in your darkest moments your friends can keep you sane and make you laugh. And, I am grateful for the friends that I have.


Cheers!
mouse

Waiting and Hoping

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday morning, on my way into work, I was reading through my emails and came to a text message from one of my close friends to tell me that... well, I won't go into the details of it here, but suffice it to say, I wanted to drop everything, get on a plane and go hug my friend, G. Since then I've been glued to Facebook and to G's blog and to G's twitter feed and to any place on line where I'm likely to come across more information.

I keep hoping for good news. I keep praying for good news. I want it to be good news so badly because I can't imagine life otherwise.

It's weird. Life yesterday morning was about getting to work, working on our 2011 plans, beating traffic, getting P to school, and all of the daily trivial details that make up our lives. Today, it all feels different. It all feels a little less important. Today, I want to take P with me to go see G and see if there's anything I can do to help. Anything, because anything feels better than waiting and hoping and praying.

Please keep my friend, G, in your thoughts and prayers.


Cheers!
mouse

The Look of Winter

Dear Friends and Family,

Biggest storm of the past 70 years headed our way. And, that means it'll look a lot more like winter tomorrow than it did yesterday because all the leaves will have fallen off of the trees. And, with October coming to a close, I've begun to think about what lies ahead for me.

Perhaps it's time for a Top Three?

There's Klein. I'd like to take a week off and spend time with her away from work and, if possible, away from home. I'd like to play with her on the beach, in the sand. Yes, I think I need a vacation.

There's work - both mine and Mr. mouse's. I'd like to know what happens to Mr. mouse in the whole reshuffling his work is going through. And, I've begun to think about me. I had a good talk with my former manager yesterday and he gave me some very good advice about how to think about my own position.

And, there's Election Day. We already voted so there's nothing actionable on this one. But, I'm watching the media to see how this election cycle turns out. There's so much hate and vitriol and misinformation out there. My prediction? I think we're headed back to the future to an era of robber barons. I think at some point the masses will revolt and the age of the union will return.

So, where does that leave me? Well, I think I should hang tight for the next couple of weeks until we launch a big initiative at work and Mr. mouse gets a feel for what work will look like (or not look like) for him in 2011. Then, I think we should plan a vacation - a five day trip if we can't get the whole week off, and enjoy ourselves. The elections will have come and gone by then. And, whatever the outcome, life will go on.

And my work? I've got two to dos from my meeting yesterday - time with my manager to see where I stand and an updated resume for my old manager.


Cheers!
mouse

10.25.10: Toddler Times

Dear Friends and Family,

P makes weekends fun.

Saturday, we slept in then ate breakfast. We went out for a haircut, which for the second time in a row, P did not like. We drove out to check out a warehouse sale. P napped. We went shoe shopping for P. We went clothes shopping for P. We went grocery shopping for all of us. P was a darling - eating strawberries and crackers, drinking her water, and captivating us with her giant eyes. We got home and P was in bed by 10:30. Ouch.

Sunday, P woke up at 8:30. Wow! We hustled to meet some friends at the zoo. P sat in the stroller and watched the people and animals go by. Not sure she made the connection to the animals. I think she "got it" at the end with the giraffes and the camels. Not sure.

Then, we let her play out the afternoon sans nap. She slept from 6:15 to 8:30 and then played for an hour before falling asleep at her usual bedtime of 9:30.

The highlight of our weekend? On Saturday, when P signaled diaper before pooping instead of after. We let her sit on top of the potty with the lid down before taking her down to change her. Sunday, she cried when she pooped. Go figure.


Cheers!
mouse

Gratitude

Dear Friends and Family,

The other night, P and I were playing on the bed. She was laughing. I was laughing. Mr. mouse came home and walked into the room and he started laughing. And, I realized how fortunate we are, and more specifically, how fortunate I am.

I was thinking about what it must have been like for my Mom when I was P's age. She was a lot less stable, financially. The mean streets of the inner City in the 70s were a lot tougher than the streets of the new millennia. My Dad had issues when I was growing up and wasn't nearly as involved or supportive a parent as Mr. mouse is. My parents fought often and my Dad threatened deportation. My parents fought often and sometimes it got physical. My parents fought often and the emotional damage was both broad and deep.

And, here we blissfully go to work and come home and laugh and play and read and enjoy our lives. And, sometimes I feel a little guilty. Why do I deserve this much happiness? And, sometimes I get a little angry. Why didn't my mom get to enjoy this much happiness? And, I realize there are no good answers.

Then, I am grateful. I am grateful to have escaped the trap of statistics that say people have a probability of perpetuating cycles they are born into. And, I am grateful for Mr. mouse for being such a supportive spouse. And, I am grateful I get to share the joy with P and start her off on her journey with a different set of statistics. And, ironically enough, I hope she doesn't escape the probability of her statistics. I hope she does perpetuate the cycle she is born into and enjoys even more abundance and happiness in her adult life.


Cheers!
mouse

Hungry Mouse

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday afternoon I was tired and frazzled and emotionally wiped and fighting the distracted eating monster. And, I didn't snack. And, the sky didn't fall.

I was hungry on the ride home, but, again, the sky didn't fall. I was tempted to snack when I got home, and I didn't, and, again, the sky didn't fall. I wasn't gut busting full when I went to sleep, and, last I checked, the sky didn't fall.

Well, I'll put that in the success column and see what today brings.


Cheers!
mouse

Day Two and Alive

Dear Friends and Family,

Ready for the shocker? I entered in all of my food yesterday and the world did not end. It was surprisingly easy to get back on the bandwagon, at least for a day. We'll see how today goes.

P went to sleep at 7:45 last night, close to two hours earlier than she typically does. She fell asleep shortly after we got home and didn't stir when I put her down in her crib. And, surprisingly enough, she slept through the entire night, sans dinner. She's going to be ravenous when she wakes. Speaking of which, I should go wake her soon so she'll be ready to go when I am.


Cheers!
mouse

Committed

Dear Friends and Family,

P's almost 18 months and I'm still carrying around her first house.

Roger, one of my friends at work, stopped by yesterday to tell me he had just signed up for Weight Watchers. I told him I'd start tracking as well.

I entered in my breakfast, lunch and snacks for today. And, I have three points left for dinner. This, my friends, is why I haven't lost my pregnancy weight. I'll clearly use some flex to get through the day. But, now, I know, I don't have any wiggle room for animal crackers or other randomness throughout the day.

Here's to getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight.


Cheers!
mouse

10.18.10: Data Dump

Dear Friends and Family,

Well, I just got a LOT of time back. I'm not sure who I'm more peeved with - my quarterback for having an atrocious game, my kicker for missing three (yes, count 'em, three) field goal attempts, or myself for not taking a trade that would have gotten me through this week. Well, any which way you slice it, I'm going to be eliminated this week and that means I get time back. Somehow, it doesn't feel as good it should given I love getting time back.

And, because life wouldn't be fun without some excitement. Mr. mouse's company has been reorganizing and rightsizing. And, at some point we will find out if he has a job in the new organization or if we will become a single income household. I think he finds out in the next month or so. I think I'm more anxious than he is, not because I'm worried about the money, but because I know how much he loves his job. He's been at it for so long it's tough for me to imagine him doing something different.

But, to end on a high note, we had a fabulous weekend at home with P. The weather was beautiful. We went to the park both days to take pictures. And, we let P play in the playground - she's still not a big fan of swings or slides, but she liked the climber and liked jumping down with some parental assist. We also go to see some serious toddler dancing - there's nothing funnier. And, because she's a darling, we got to see some toddler logic - she bumped her head, and wanted to be soothed, and because her teether is soothing, she held it up to her head to see if it would make her head feel better as well.


Cheers!
mouse

Social Media Overload

Dear Friends and Family,

Uncle.

There's just too much "stuff" to consume. And, not enough time to consume it. There's facebook. There's foursquare. There's flickr. There's email. There's blogs. There's fantasy football. There's the news. And, my daily sudoku puzzle to keep the noggin sharp.

I can't keep up. Something's gotta go. What happens if I disengage from a social media platform? Does the world come to a screeching halt? No. Okay, phew, wouldn't want that to happen. Does my life come to a screeching halt? No. Okay, phew, that's a good thing.

So, seems like a low risk way to get back some time.

Foursquare. That can go. Easy. Done.

News. Sad, but true. I'm willing to sacrifice that to the time gods.

Facebook. Limited to Top News vs. Most Recent.

Which leaves a manageable amount of stuff to consume. I think. Well, let's try it for awhile and see if my mornings seem less scattered. Perhaps I should take a week off from all of it and just do some weights in the morning or get on the exercise bike. Now that's a thought.


Cheers!
mouse

Still Alive

Dear Friends and Family,

I made it another week in my fantasy football league.

I have yet to watch a full game. I still need to think for a couple of moments to figure out the difference between an RB and a WR. But, despite all that, thanks to some immense luck, I have eluded elimination. My day will come.

Remember my league? The one with the goofy rules? Each week we eliminate the team that scored the lowest points that week. Then, their players become free agents and we "redraft" them in reverse order of that week's scores.

Last week, since I was second from the bottom, I had first pick of the eliminated team. While it's fun to have first pick, it's not good to be the second lowest scoring team. We'll see how this all plays out. Sooner or later (more probably sooner rather than later), my day will come.

I'm just glad to have made it this far.


Cheers!
mouse

P Catches the Flu

Dear Friends and Family,

Yes. What's old is new again.

After hacking for the past two weeks, I've finally convinced the rest of the family to join in the fun and games. They called from school yesterday to say that P had a temperature of 101 and needed to go home.

We made it home in one piece thanks to some light traffic. And, since I've got phone calls all day, ironically enough, Mr. mouse is going to somehow manage with her. I wish I could stay home with her. But, I missed two days last week to being sick and one afternoon to a doctor's appointment and I've got another one this week and it just seems like there's too much going on to miss yet another day.

I really to wish I could stay home with her. My little P. There's nothing like holding her when she wants to be held.


Cheers!
mouse

10.11.10: Reunion Weekend

Dear Friends and Family,

We went home this weekend for reunion. And, it was a success of somewhat limited scope.

P was okay on the plane. We had fun walking outside on Saturday. My mom got to play with P. I got to see a bunch of old friends at reunion. And, we saw Mr. mouse's folks on Sunday.

So? Well, P had a rough night on Saturday so Mr. mouse had to leave reunion early to do disaster recovery. And, I got to see a bunch of friends from freshman and sophomore year, but the junior and senior year friends remain MIA through two reunions now. And, last but not least, because we had an early afternoon flight, we had only the briefest of visits with Mr. mouse's folks.

Still, all in all, it was a good weekend. Time traveling with P is always good.

One thing that's interesting is watching my mom and Mr. mouse's step-mom with P. I think my mom scares P right off the bat. She comes in the room a rush of energy and noise and P just stares at the hyper-kinetic whirlwind and runs for our laps. Mr. mouse's step-mom, on the other hand, approaches slowly and let's P get used to her before playing quietly with her. I think P does better with the latter, but I don't know how to tell my mom that without hurting her feelings.

And, last but not least, P learned to take her shirt off by herself yesterday. Excellent.


Cheers!
mouse

Deb Gibson Strikes Again?

Dear Friends and Family,

Ever since I found an impossible restaurant reservation, Mr. mouse and I have jokingly referred to my luck as an alter ego - Deb Gibson for her song "Only in My Dreams."

Deb Gibson has found a couple of scores. And, this morning looking for hotel rooms for a trip we're contemplating committing to, I think she may have scored again.

We'll see. It may be a dive. It may not be available. There may be hidden charges. Anything can happen.

But, I'm hopeful that it all works out.


Cheers!
mouse

10.06.10: Mouse Catches the Flu

Dear Friends and Family,

I'm not dead although there were times this past weekend I wasn't so sure.

Yes. I, who so prides herself in never getting sick, got sick. Fever, chills, aches, cough, hacking cough, headache, crusty eyes sick. It was beautiful. Really. So, I'm not sure I have much recollection of the weekend beside sitting in bed, lying in bed, lying on the couch and lying on the floor resting in whatever comfortable position I could find.

I worked from home Monday and Tuesday which entailed driving P out to school and then parking the car at the train station so that Mr. mouse could pick her up in the evening.

I think I was able to stay on top of my work, and get some rest. But, today, I'm going to attempt the office. My poor colleagues. They're going to have to listen to me hack my brains out.

Grossed out yet? Because I am.

On to more fun topics. P's ever growing vocabulary. She's begun saying yes (yeah) and her no is a verbal no now instead of just a shake of the head. She's definitely picked up mine (mine) and milk (milk, drawn out with the middle going down and the end of the word going up). She's got book and bottle down and says more book and more bottle. She's said hi and bye on occasion, but not consistently. My current focus has been teaching her the word please. More book please.

She's figured out where the animals are in her lift a flap book. And, her current interest is in finding Emily Elizabeth on every page of her Clifford book. She likes to make fish sounds in her Good Night book. And, she loves stacking people in her bus to wheel around the rug. She's got body parts down in time for her 18 month check up. And, she's figuring out colors more consistently now. She'll point to Mr. mouse or me if we ask where's mommy or where's daddy. She'll point to herself if we ask where's P. And, she'll point to her classmates if we ask where's so and so.

And, that, is life with P.

The funny thing was we got selected for the follow-up census questionnaire. And, in it you have to provide more detailed information about each member of your household, including P. One of the questions was speaks English, well, okay, not well, not at all. And, I wanted to put, come on, she's not even two years old yet, but that wasn't an option. So, I picked not well which was the closest fit. Perhaps they'll assume she speaks another language better, but, well, that wouldn't be true either.


Cheers!
mouse

Mouse Catches Up

Dear Friends and Family,

Not surprisingly, I overslept yesterday morning - somehow convincing myself that it was Saturday when the alarm clock rang.

And, today is Friday, and I've got to catch up on emails and stuff before I can settle into the weekend. Every week it seems like the next week will be less hectic than the last. But, every week something new pops up that keeps the craziness constant.

Perhaps I need a vacation - some days off with nothing to do. I'll have to ask Mr. mouse about that... I'm feeling like I'm burning out or at least I'm burning more than I'm taking in and that will eventually lead to burn out.

Time to recharge.


Cheers!
mouse