Off to Work

Dear Friends and Family,

Last night I realized I was bitter. After much discussion and negotiation, I had agreed to work part-time. And, I thought it was a good idea. Except, this past week it's been the worst idea ever. I feel like I haven't been a good mom. I feel like I haven't been a good worker. And, I have done diddly squat on my idea. All in all, not a great week to be mouse.

So, today I'm headed into the office. So, at least I'll be a good worker even if I'm not a good mom or a good entrepreneur. And, next week, hopefully, will be a better week on all three fronts.

Honestly, it's been non-stop trying to just stay on top of school this week. I'm hoping next week truly finds a happier medium. If not, something will have to give. This morning it was ordering 2 leotards, 2 tights, and 15 pairs of dance shoes to try on next week because apparently we were expected to know to bring P in dance clothes for her class.

I should back track a little here. When last we spoke I was planning on leaving work. So, why am I headed into work? On my very last day, we decided to switch me from full-time to part-time work. I'd work between 15 and 20 hours a week, averaging out to 17.5 a week. I'd come into the office two times a week, usually on Tuesday and Thursday for about five to six hours and I'd work from home the other days for an hour or two checking emails and taking meetings by phone as needed.

This would give me the flexibility to pick P up from school every day. I'd still have time three days a week to work on my idea. And, for all of this, I'd get to keep 70% of my old pay check. It seemed like a great idea. Except, this week it hasn't been. With P out of school on three days and my computer working in fits and bursts, I haven't gotten much of anything done. So, today I'm going in to the office to get through the work and the IT issues.

Hopefully next week is better. Otherwise, I may have to resign a second time.


Cheers!
mouse

Resurfacing

Dear Friends and Family,

Where to begin?

Well, I'm begin with the easiest one. P. P's last day at school was Friday, August 23rd as planned. She had a good day. Mr. mouse and I went to pick her up. We got all of her things. We took lots of pictures. We gave lots of hugs. We walked out together.

We took a week off to go on a family vacation. Then, we had Monday off. P went to school for an hour with Mr. mouse and me on Tuesday for orientation. She spent the rest of Tuesday with me. She had a first full day of classes yesterday and spent the afternoon with me. She had today off. Then, she's back at school on Friday.

She had a meltdown last night about not getting enough time with Mr. mouse. I think she misses spending time with him. There's a lot of new stuff we're throwing at her. She's got new teachers, new classmates, a new building, a new food routine, a new schedule, and more time with Mom. It's a LOT to be throwing at a four-year-old.

I think, at a minimum, we'll need to give her 2-3 weeks of a regular schedule to see how she's doing. Which means the next checkpoint will be the end of September.

I won't lie, it's been a tough week. With Monday off, Tuesday for orientation, Wednesday full day, Thursday off, and Friday full day, there's no routine whatsoever to the week. On top of that, Mr. mouse has a work dinner tonight and I have Mom's night tomorrow night, and I'm probably going in to work tomorrow (more on that later) so there's really no routine whatsoever. We had a morning coffee yesterday, needed to stop by the school store for school shirts, and tomorrow's the first "wear the school colors" day for P. We had lots of discussions about P's milk (we're allowed to bring it after much wrangling). It feels like a week with no rhyme or reason.

What do I like about the new routine that'll be coming up? I won't miss traffic. I get to take the bus with P which involves a lot less thinking. I also get a mini walk in four times a day. I won't miss work (more on that later). I get a little piece of work (more on that later) and some time for myself. I'm excited for P. I hope she settles in and likes school. I'm excited to be able to spend more time with P. I'm excited that I'm starting with a blank slate and get to rewrite my life and my habit strategy. It feels like a new chapter.

What am I going to miss? I miss time in the car with P. I know, I don't miss traffic. But, I do miss the conversations we had in the car. I miss playing number squeeze challenge, singing, playing this animal, playing rhyming games, talking about people and why they do what they do, joking about chocolate chip cookie accidents, pointing out trains and cement mixers and construction and everything else we noticed on the roads, and everything else we did in the car to entertain ourselves on the way to school. P's a lot more quiet on the bus. Perhaps she'll start talking more on the bus and we'll get to enjoy that too. I miss the familiar. I miss seeing old friends at drop-off and pick-up at school. I miss my routines.

Well, today's a busy day. P and I get to finish a science experiment we started last night. And, then we may take a drive for old times sake. And, this afternoon she has dance.


Cheers!
mouse

1, I Think

Dear Friends and Family,

I've never had a busier second to last day. Fire drills in the morning. Snafus with the wireless not working. Lunch meetings. Conference calls with India in the early afternoon. Lunch at my desk during a meeting. More meetings. Squeezed in meetings. People waiting at my desk.

I thought 4 o'clock would never get here. But, it did, as it always does.

And, after packing up my bag, I headed out to drop off the car and go to happy hour. I had a fabulous time. Several moms showed up. More people than I expected from work showed up. It was good.

In a way, I hope the part-time offer falls through because today it feels right to be thinking about leaving. I still have a batch of things I need to do in the office, but it feels like thinking about leaving is the right thing to do.

I have a 9 o'clock with my boss. We'll see where this all lands.


Cheers!
mouse

2?

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Thursday and I still have real work to do. I need to complete a mid-year assessment for one of my associates and I need to complete a presentation that my boss will give on my behalf next week.

Then, I have my going away happy hour this afternoon.

The only thing is I am exhausted. A bad storm woke me up at one, and I didn't really go back to sleep until my alarm clock rang. Sigh.

And, I know I'll have to get closure within the next day or two on whether or not I will stay for part-time work.

Really? Can leaving be any more difficult?

My first job was gracious. My team took me out to lunch, gave me some wonderful presents and wished me well at school. I left on a high note. My second job was typical. My team took me out to lunch and wished me well. I left on a high note. My third job was a little frenetic. My team scheduled lunch. HR decided I needed to be "walked" because my next job was a "competitor." My team still took me out to lunch and wished me well. I left on a high note.

This job? My team took me out to lunch. Everyone is wishing me well. Somehow, they're really making it hard to leave. Truly, why am I not surprised? Why appreciate you when you're there? Let's wait until you quit and then fight you tooth and nail to make you stay. That makes so much sense. Right.


Cheers!
mouse

3, The Ultimate in Random

Dear Friends and Family,

I am somewhat seriously considering working part-time for work. They're coming back to me today with an offer. I'll see if I take them up on it. I thought it would be rude to not at least have the conversation with them about it.

I also thought of two more things that I should have brought up with my bosses' boss yesterday. I'm somewhat kicking myself over it today. But, I'll bring them up with my boss today. We'll take it from there.

Happy Wednesday!


Cheers!
mouse

4, Reality Beginning to Set In

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Tuesday morning of my last week at full time employment. It's a weird feeling. I've got a couple of meetings today - one with my business unit head, my official exit interview, and several with friends and colleagues. I've begun giving out hugs because it's possible I will not see people again while I am at work this week.

I'm going through the motions and reality is beginning to set in. Oddly, I don't think it'll feel real until I hand in my badge, get in my car, drive to pick up P, and come home. Sometime after that it'll feel real. Right now, it's all a little surreal. Keep in mind, when we were expecting P, it didn't feel real until the night when she was born and I was holding her in my arms, talking to her while the whole world slept. Yes, being nine months pregnant didn't feel real. So, it's hardly surprising that this doesn't feel completely real.

Either way, it's Tuesday and I have four days left at work.


Cheers!
mouse

08.19.13: 5

Dear Friends and Family,

You couldn't ask for a better weekend, minus one painful monkey wrench.

We enjoyed the wonderful weekend weather, taking P on a bike ride, enjoying dinner on the roof, and going to the beach.

The only hiccup in all of this was my ankle. I've decided that walking and daydreaming is just a bad combination for me. That's when I roll my ankle and this time I rolled it pretty bad. The giant scrape on my right knee only made it worse. And, walking to the beach afterwards didn't help. And, forgetting to take Advil didn't help. And, sleeping without a brace certainly didn't help. So, I'm in a world of hurt this morning.

Outside of that, the weekend was great. P had so much fun in the sand and in the water. I think I'll take her to play in the sand even when the weather cools down a little. I think she'll enjoy it. I hope she grows up loving the water. It was such an integral part of my childhood.

P was so solicitous yesterday. She asked repeatedly if I was okay. She offered to help me walk by holding my hand. She cried when I told her I couldn't walk to the car with her and Mr. mouse. She helped me clean my knee when we got home. She gave me lots of hugs and kisses. I'm glad she's so compassionate.

And, now, I enter my final week at work. Many, many days down, five to go.


Cheers!
mouse

6...

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday, my boss asked if I would be willing to come back part time after next Friday. And, to be honest, I'm not sure.

In a way, it's the perfect blend of work and non-work. I can do four hours a day and be home before P finishes school. I know moms who would kill for that arrangement - work twenty hours a week at a nice hourly rate, be done with work by the time their kids are done with school, focus on home for the afternoon.

And, that's why I'm not disregarding it out of hand.

But, at the same time, I know if I did that, I'd be postponing work on my idea. And, I really do want to work on my idea. I realize that someone else's ideal isn't my ideal. I just want to make sure I don't regret it if I do decide to pass on the part-time opportunity.

Either way, it's Friday and I don't owe anyone a decision until Monday. Happy Friday.


Cheers!
mouse

PS: P proclaimed yesterday that if she does decide to become a mommy, she wants Mr. mouse to be the daddy. I told her he would be too old by then and then we moved on to another topic. Mr. mouse assures me this is normal - that the other likely candidates would be Prince Eric and Jim Darling. I guess it is normal.

7?

Dear Friends and Family,

I had a great discussion with my former boss yesterday. He was very supportive of my decision. It felt really good to close the loop with him and get his advice on my idea. Then, my boss approached me about staying longer. I told him I needed to sleep on it.

We also had a play date yesterday. We met more parents. I'm feeling more comfortable now with the school decision we came to. A lot of the parents seem like perfectly nice people. I'll miss the parents from P's current school, but I'm not feeling as anxious anymore.

So, it's back to work today for another day.

On the home front, Mr. mouse and I have been at odds with each other the last few days. We had it out Sunday night because he was being an @$$ and criticizing everything for no real reason. And, we just had it out this morning. I'm not sure what the issue is. I feel like he's not being a supportive husband. No, it's not that. He is being a supportive husband. He's just being bossy now. This morning I felt the need to remind him that I not going to not say something just because I think it'll make him angry. If it needs to be said, it needs to be said, and if he's going to get angry about it, we'll all deal with the consequences, but I'm not going to not say it just because I think it'll make him angry.

Lovely.


Cheers!
mouse

8?

Dear Friends and Family,

Eight days left of work and today is a half day. P has her last play date with her new school this afternoon so I'll be picking her up early.

On the docket for today? I need to call her new school about lactose free milk and adding a mailing address to our account. I need to also do some trip planning for a trip we have coming up this fall. I need to work with a manager on my team to move meetings off of my calendar and onto hers in case she needs to make changes after I'm gone.

And, that's it for today. It's going quickly.


Cheers!
mouse

9

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday, I gave notice. My boss and I spoke for nearly two hours after I gave notice. I'll miss him.

It feels good to be out in the open. It feels good to be going down a path I am excited about. It feels good to be moving on.

It also feels a little surreal, truth be told.

The funniest thing happened in the afternoon. A friend, Alex, stopped by. He wanted to make sure he caught me before I left. It touched my heart. My friend, Pete, was genuinely happy for me. My girlfriends were a little sad, but happy for me.

It all went better than I thought it would.

And, now, I should begin letting people know. I cleared my desk yesterday. Today, I'll write my 1:1 letters. I'll write my more formal letter the day I leave.

The next two weeks will go quickly.


Cheers!
mouse

08.12.13: 10

Dear Friends and Family,

P had lots of parent time this weekend. We spent Saturday morning together walking the neighborhood doing errands. P had the afternoon with Mr. mouse while I napped. We went to a birthday party together where P saw a working farm. Our kid is no longer deathly afraid of animals. We played school together.

Sunday, we went to church together. We went to look at ships together. We went to the park together. We painted together. We played school together.

I so enjoyed the baby years. And, the toddler years were fun. Now, I'm glad to enjoy the little kid years.

Last night, I cleared out my computer and my phone. I printed out my letter, signed it, and put it in an envelope. Today, I tell my boss. I tell my employees. And, on the way home, I tell P.

We're entering into a new phase together and I'm super excited.


Cheers!
mouse

11, I Define Me

Dear Friends and Family,

Oops. I forgot to hit the publish button yesterday. Sorry.

My day off yesterday was wonderful. I picked up a birthday gift for a friend. I picked up parking stickers. I ate dinner with P. And, I slept.

And, this morning, I had a chance to read the article instead of skimming it like I did yesterday. And, I'm feeling better.

Here's why I think I'm different. And, I know, everyone thinks they're unique. But, here's my thoughts.

1. My work doesn't define me. P does not define me. Mr. mouse does not define me.
   
   I define me.
   
   This is something I learned when I was in my early thirties at my last work. My self-worth and my self-confidence can't be defined my anyone but me. And, I alone define it.
2. The women in the article speak about shifting and sliding relationships with their spouse. I think it's different for Mr. mouse and me. We had 14 years together before P was born. Fourteen years during which we learned a lot about each other and dealt with our share of rough patches. I'm hopeful that those years make a difference. We're not a couple that met in our late-twenties/early-thirties dated for a couple of years, got married, had kids, and opted out. We're a couple that met while he was in business school, dated while I was in business school, got married, enjoyed a decade of marriage, had P, enjoyed four more years of being a family of three, and are now thinking about our next chapter in life.
3. Which brings me to my third observation. P is older than the infants defined in the article. She's four and starting full-time school. I'm not going to have some jarring moment when I transition from a full-time mom to a part-time mom with a kid in school. I don't think I'm a full-time mom.

I think I'm me. I'm retiring from work as I know it. I don't want a full-time job in a middle management position in a large corporation. After 15 years I'm done with that. I'm ready to retire. But, retirement for me never meant turning off my brain and golfing for the rest of my life. It just meant more flexibility to work on my own terms - perhaps something part time, or entrepreneurial, or something consulting based. It meant shifting in and out of work as I saw interesting things vs. getting up every morning for the rest of my life to continue doing more of what I'm doing now.

I'll still spend time with P. I want to. She's important. She's cool. She needs me. I love her. But, she doesn't define me. I'm looking forward to spending time with P, but I'm not retiring to be a full-time mom.

The house. A lot of the women seem to have a love/hate relationship with the house. I'm looking forward to housework. I benefit from a clean house more than Mr. mouse or P. I can't wait to go through the house and let me obsessive-compulsive side get a little obsessive-compulsive. And, no, I don't plan on doing the cleaning. We'll still keep our help for that, at least for now.

And, me. I'm very eager to spend some time on me. I want to get my health back. And, I'm excited about that.

So, after thinking and sleeping and rereading, I'm convinced I'm different. I hope I'm right.


Cheers!
mouse

12, Bonus Day

Dear Friends and Family,

Bonus day!

My boss is on vacation and I have one day vacation left that I know I won't be able to use once I give notice, so I'm taking today off. I slept in. I read my news. I'm writing my blog. Once I drop P off at school, I'll have some time to just relax and get my head on straight.

The only sour note is just as I'm getting ready to leave the work force, there's an article in the NY Times about "the opt out generation" and how they "want back in." Could any article have been more poorly timed? Am I going to regret my move ten years from now? I hope not. Ten years from now I'll be in my fifties. It'll be a little late for regrets at that point. Or, ten years from now, will I think this was the smartest decision ever?

It's funny. You do a bunch of soul searching. You talk to friends. You talk to your spouse. You do more soul searching. You come to a decision. Then, you let some generic article take you back to square one.

Nice, mouse. Nice.

I need to convince myself that I'm on the right path and that I'm doing the right thing. Or, just plow on ahead for the next 12 days regardless of the path and see where it leads me. I'm not going to not quit on Monday. I'm just perplexed now if I'm making the right decision.


Cheers!
mouse

13

Dear Friends and Family,

I had a most wonderful evening last night. Mr. mouse took me to the ballgame to see my favorite team play. The weather was perfect. P made it through the evening. And, although my favorite team lost, it was an exciting game which is all you can ever ask for. I even almost saw my favorite player play.

Days like yesterday make being tired the next morning worth it.

I need to get through more errands today. I need to drop off the last of the teacher gifts. And, we need to pick up mail. Hopefully the back pack I ordered for P is the right size for her for school this fall. That, and we're expecting another Egypt book because my mom goobered the one we brought home to show her. I swear, my family can be so careless with things. I know material things are only things and it's not worth getting upset over. But, they're notoriously careless and so they end up wasting money constantly replacing things. Thankfully, we seem to be able to take care of things in the mouse pad.

And, today is Hump Day. If I can make it through today the week will seem that much shorter tomorrow.


Cheers!
mouse

08.06.13: Welcome to 2013

Dear Friends and Family,

We spent the weekend with our neighbors. There was much food and time to catch up. And, as always, it's a little sad to see them go. I felt like I really had a chance to talk to them this time, even if things were so busy with stuff to do. We had a chance to talk college and careers and personality types and that's not something we get to do often.

Then, Monday came and it was time to drop off presents at school. One thing I've learned is P is shy even with her old teachers. Another thing I learned is she really doesn't like little kids. I had to talk to her about her manners, we had a lot of not responsiveness when her old teachers asked her questions and a lot of fidgeting when the younger kids started crying. I guess I should try to remember she's only four. She said she'd be better about it when we go to say bye in three weeks. We'll see.

And, Monday night, I got a little gift from Mr. mouse and me. I got a new iPhone to replace my feature phone. I needed a new phone because, in three weeks, I need to turn in my work phone. Yes, it's the one thing I wanted to buy for this transition. Now, I'm off to counting again.

14 days.


Cheers!
mouse

22, Definitely 22, Probably 22, What is 22?

Dear Friends and Family,

I had one of those days yesterday. My boss has been confiding in me more. He's getting me more resources. He's engaged in my work. He cares.

In short, he's being a good boss.

And, unfortunately, despite all the goodness flowing my way, I think the right answer is to still leave work. I think.

I just wish he wasn't going on vacation next week so I could quit already. Whoever thought it'd be this difficult to leave work?

Well, there's another person who's been on vacation for the past week and half. I'm sure once he's back I'll be more eager to leave. In fact, someone mentioned he's back today.


Cheers!
mouse

Not 1

Dear Friends and Family,

Today promises to be a busy day. And, tomorrow I'll go into work. And, I guess I will wait until my boss gets back before I quit. This is so complicated with him going on vacation next week.

I guess it's just another regular Thursday in the office. I hope my ear and head get better. At some point in the day yesterday a stabbing pain started on the right side of my head. I don't think it bodes well.


Cheers!
mouse

Not 2

Dear Friends and Family,

And just when I thought I was in my final countdown mode, I found out my boss is on vacation all next week. This gives me three options:

1. quit before he leaves: This is an unattractive option because I'm not ready (e.g. I haven't cleared my phone and computer yet) and it'll put a damper on his vacation, not much of a damper, but a damper nonetheless.
2. quit while he is gone: I'm sure the first thing that my boss' boss would do is email my boss on vacation and let him know. He'll wonder why I couldn't do this before he left for vacation or after he came back from vacation. I also like my boss more than my boss' boss so I'd rather have the conversation with him. He's earned that.
3. quit after he comes back: This seems like the least unattractive option of the three. It does mean I'll only have two weeks of transition and it does mean I'll have to put in my best faith effort at working next week. And it does mean I need to rejigger my to do list a little. And I'm not sure if I'll take this Friday off after all, but I guess this is the path I'm headed down.

I'm not sure it's the best option. Come back from a week at Jamaica. Have your employee quit on you. But, what's option B? Not much better, truth be told.


Cheers!
mouse

3

Dear Friends and Family,

Three.

Three.

Three!!!

Three.

That's 1, 2, 3. Three.

Three more days to the week. Then, I have Friday off. And, hopefully, I am giving my notice on Monday next week.

Yesterday was a stupid day. I got into a battle of wills with a business partner over the stupidest of things. It was like high school. But, I stood my ground. In hindsight, if I was staying, I would have probably written her boss and told him that we hadn't finalized the decision yet so badgering me wasn't going to help any. But, I didn't.

Know why? Because I have three days left.


Cheers!
mouse

07.29.13: Frenetic, but Happy Weekend

Dear Friends and Family,

Not a weekend I would have planned for in any way, shape, or form, but in addition to having our neighbors over from the winter cabin, we flew home for my cousin's wedding and saw Book of Mormon. Oh, and this week counts down the second to last week before I give notice. See? Not a weekend I would have planned for in any way, shape, or form.

The wedding itself was fun. The food at the cocktail hour was better than the food at the dinner. The highlights were how happy my uncle and aunt were that we could make it, learning that one of my favorite cousins has moved back to the states, catching up with my brother, watching P dance, and taking photos in the photo booth with P.

I think she wants more photo booth pictures so Mr. mouse and I are trying to figure out how to manage that one... Unfortunately, we didn't get one of the strips that P and I took, but I'm going to focus on the positive with the one we did get. I think the guy manning the booth didn't realize we did two of them. Sigh.

Then, we came home and Mr. mouse took P to the park while I went to see Book of Mormon with my neighbors. It was so funny, I laughed until I cried. We came home and I had a chance to catch up with the Mom and Daughter while Mr. mouse went out for wine, steaks and baguette with the Dad.

It was a little brisk, but we enjoyed time on the roof. And, that, my friends, is a perfect way to finish off a happy weekend.


Cheers!
mouse

5

Dear Friends and Family,

I got through my meetings yesterday and outside of that my day was quite dull.

I realized something, my days are quite dull when my old boss is on vacation. Let's call him Joe, when Joe is out, life is easier. Unfortunately, I think Joe is back next week.

This morning I have two meetings. I think I'll leave after those meetings. After all, Joe is back next week. Is that bad?


Cheers!
mouse

6

Dear Friends and Family,

It's getting harder and harder to fill my days at the office. Since I'm not taking on new work and I'm not really thinking ahead to what should be worked on, my days are slowly emptying. It's the most boring feeling ever.

Fortunately, my day today is chock-a-block full. Then, tomorrow, I may go in for a meeting and then enjoy the rest of the day out in the sun. Is that bad? I may, I may not. I may, instead, go shopping for a new phone. I need a new phone.

We'll see how motivated I feel tomorrow. Until then, I'll attend my meetings and not try to complain too much.


Cheers!
mouse

7

Dear Friends and Family,

Work is getting dull. I'm not kicking off a lot of new work because I'm loathe to start something that can't be finished. And, the stuff on my plate is eminently manageable. So, I find myself with a lot of free time on my hands. I'm sure I'm due for a fire drill that occupies all of my day and let's work pile up around me. Still, until then, I'll enjoy myself and read more on-line.

I updated my to do list and found that it's a mess of stuff that needs to happen in the next four weeks. Nothing like having stuff to do to galvanize a mouse into action. Lots of stuff for P's current school, P's new school, and for me to quit.

Seven days left. That's not a lot of days.


Cheers!
mouse

8

Dear Friends and Family,

I'm tired of waiting. Are you tired of waiting?

One day down, another eight to go. This is worse than waiting for The Prince of Cambridge's birth. Because, royal babies don't change my day-to-day life, leaving work for the first time without something solid and specific lined up does. At least, with this, it's finite, we know what the end game looks like.

Eight days to go and then I can give my notice. In the mean time, there's so many little things I can focus on - like getting a new cell phone since I use my work phone for nearly everything, and finishing up our will since I thought we were angling to do that before I left work, and clearing out my computer. And, then there's stuff for leaving school - like presents and downloading photos. And, then there's stuff for new school like our meeting this afternoon.

Perhaps I should focus on all of that instead of focusing on merely watching the days go by. Because there's nothing quite like watching paint dry to drive a mouse to distraction.


Cheers!
mouse

07.22.13: Howdy Y'all

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a busy, busy weekend with friends in town from Wisconsin. Our old neighbor and his girlfriend came in for the weekend and we had a ton of fun.

Friday night we gorged on Cuban food. Saturday, we went for dim sum and then went to the museum to see a couple of exhibits they were interested in. P fell asleep at the museum, but she had fun while she was awake.

We spent Saturday evening on the deck eating ice cream and pizza and enjoying the wonderful weather. We came in when the ominous clouds came in. And, we spent the rest of the evening playing with P. When P fell a sleep, we played spades, girls vs. boys until we were all ready to pass out.

Sunday, I went to church. Then, P and I went to the park to play in the sprinklers while Mr. mouse went on a bike ride with our friends. The afternoon was a bit of a mish-mosh because we were all a little tired. Mr. mouse made magic fried rice. Our friends went for a walk. P and I took naps.

Then, they had to leave. And, we had the evening to eat dinner and wind down the weekend.

And, now it's Monday and I have nine more days at work before I give notice. Nine. That's right. Nine.


Cheers!
mouse

Two More Weeks

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Friday! And, I'm tired.

It will be nice when it's the weekend. As in, it'll be nice when I'm done with work today. Then, I'll have two weeks left before I give notice. Honestly, I'm getting a little tired of the charade. I'll be happy once I can have the discussion with my boss and begin to really wind down.

Last night, another one of my analysts left work. He's headed to the Bay area to join a technology company. I managed him when he was just out of school. And, now he's 25 and infinitely more mature than when I had him. It's nice to see progress. I'm proud of him and I'll miss him.

I'm beginning to keep a list of people I need to include on my farewell email. Such is life. Happy Friday!


Cheers!
mouse

Play Date II

Dear Friends and Family,

We had our second play date with P's new class yesterday. P had a lot of fun running around the playground. Other parents told us how cute she is, although I'm assuming that's something they say about a lot of girls. We had a chance to spend more time talking to the other parents. And, all in all, it got us one step closer to week 1 of school in September.

It'll be here before we know it. That'll be good.


Cheers!
mouse

Now What?

Dear Friends and Family,

We got back P's test results from her psycho-educational report. The evaluator had nothing but positive things to say about her. Not to brag, but here are some quotes:

• exceptionally bright young lady with a myriad of talents and abilities
• happy, gentle personality
• lengthy attention span despite her young age
• conscientious and persistent in her problem-solving efforts
• in school, P would be considered an exceptionally quick thinker
• P demonstrates exceptional cognitive abilities
• she would benefit from an educational program appropriate for highly gifted children
• consider offering P grade advancement for all or part of the day especially in reading

Now, we can order new books for P. We can glow about the report for two or three days. And then we can go back to enjoying our wonderful four-year-old who still loves to play peekaboo with Daddy.


Cheers!
mouse

07.16.13: Home Again

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a fabulous weekend visiting with our Motor City friends. We drove out Saturday afternoon and got to Ann Arbor in time to play in the playground before going out to dinner.

Sunday, Mr. mouse took P down to the hotel pool. Then, we went to see a Tigers game. It was a scorcher. We didn't even make it one full inning in our seats. Fortunately, we caved before everyone else did and found a table and three chairs in the air conditioned lounge and watched the game from there. In one sense it was sad to be at the ball park watching a game on television, but in another sense, we enjoyed ourselves more, which, I guess, is ultimately what matters.

Sunday night we saw our friends, Auntie Lisa and her family. P had so much fun coloring her rocket ship. And, we had fun catching up with the grown-ups. P's begun playing by herself more. It's nice she's showing her independence, but I hope she doesn't leave Mr. mouse and me altogether. I still like playing with her. I'm not ready for her to grow up yet.

Monday, we had our dentist visit. Mr. mouse got a chipped tooth fixed. I apparently had a cracked tooth that the dentist fixed. And, P went through her exam with flying colors.

We spent the afternoon with our friends D and D. D played Legos with P building a fire truck filled with fire fighters while D, the other D, and I spent the afternoon talking. We drove home through some miserable rain, but got home the same time flights would have.

And, now it's Tuesday and I have three more weeks until I give notice. And, this week is a short week to boot. Hooray!


Cheers!
mouse

Another Friday, Another Week

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Friday. That means I'm closing out another week at work.

This was a slow week. But, it was a good week. We spent yesterday afternoon laying out plans for the fall. I won't be there to execute any of it, but I feel like I've given the teams the tools to think about it and I've given the teams enough of my vision that they can execute it without me. And, that's a good thing.

I also gave notification at P's school. Her last day is officially August 23rd. It's becoming real.

I'll miss work. But, at the same time, I'm excited about retiring from the work I've known for the past two decades and moving on to my next chapter of life where I have more flexible work and time for myself.


Cheers!
mouse

Losing Our Bliss

Dear Friends and Family,

We've decided to get P tested. I'm not sure the number matters to me. But, there are programs we want to enroll her in that require testing and passing. Unlike crazy parents, we are not preparing for the test. Honestly, it's a chance to know where your kid is at. Why would I want fake results?

This Saturday we peg a number on our kid. I'm still not sure the number matters to me. But, there is a piece of me that is curious.

If she's 100, what does that mean? If she's 120, what does that mean? If she's 140, what does that mean? If she's 160, what does that mean? Do we do anything different in any of these scenarios? I'm not sure and that's why I'm not sure the number matters to me.

Saturday at 10, we go in for testing. If ignorance is bliss, we'll be a little less blissful after we find out whatever there is to know.


Cheers!
mouse

I'm All Alone

Dear Friends and Family,

Last night, during bath, P had a very sad moment. It started with water in her mouth and then went to something about her knee and then went to someone hitting her at school and then went to the root cause of her sadness, she misses her teacher who left in June and her best friend who also left in June. She says she is all alone. Most of the kids have paired up and she is bereft without her pair.

It really broke my heart to hear her. I was a lonely kid at school. From 4th to 6th grade, I had one close friend at school. I would have been crushed if she moved. And 7th and 8th grade, when my parents moved me, I had two close friends. I'm still friends with them, mostly through Facebook. Again, I would have been crushed if either of them moved.

So, I feel really bad for P. I'm going to talk to her this morning and also call the teachers this afternoon. I want P to end her four years at school on a high note, not remember her school for the place she was lonely.


Cheers!
mouse

Four Weeks and Counting and Sometimes Conflicted

Dear Friends and Family,

There are days I enjoy work. Like yesterday. Yesterday was a good day.

And, after days like that, I am a little sad to be thinking about leaving at the end of summer. And, the money always feels nice. At the same time, I am excited about the prospect of taking time off, of focusing on my health and cleaning the house, of working on my idea.

Why am I never happy? I guess I am happy. It will be hard to leave, but it will be good to leave. I will miss the comfort of work. I will miss the security of a pay check. I will miss the routine of work. I will miss my friends. It will be hard to leave, but it will be good to leave.

I should enjoy the remaining time. And, in the process, I'm sure I'll encounter some bad days that will remind me that not every day is a good day like yesterday.


Cheers!
mouse

07.08.13: Staycation 2013

Dear Friends and Family,

In the end, we decided to stay at home for the four day weekend. And, I had so much fun, I'm glad we did.

Thursday, we decided to take P to the carnival. There's something about it. Maybe it's growing up near the beach and the broad walk as a kid and remembering going to the ride the rides. Maybe it's high school trips with friends. Maybe it's childhood trips with my grandfather. I like going. And, I'm glad P likes going.

We bought an all you can ride bracelet for $50 that was good for four days. P rode close to 50 rides between our trip on Thursday and our return visit on Saturday, if not more, so it was well worth the initial outlay. We finished with a family ride on the carousel. P also won a mini rocket launcher and a yellow dolphin.

Friday, P rode her scooter and went to the park with Mr. mouse. Apparently she went splashing in the fountains and came home dripping wet. She's so much fun.

In the afternoon, we went to another festival. This one was to watch the hot air balloons, which did not launch. The balloon glow was fun and the fireworks couldn't have been closer. The funniest part of it all? We decided to get a wagon to haul the lawn chairs. And, in the process, we learned that P is something of a wagon connoisseur asking about shade covers and other features before we bought the wagon. She was giddy riding in it on the way back to the car, offering to hold the picnic blanket on her lap to do her part in carrying stuff. Moments like these are what make it worth it to have a kid.

Saturday night, after the carnival, we went to a birthday party for one of P's friends. She had a blast going down the slide and riding the paddle boats. She's a natural with the boats. We had fun catching up with other parents and eating fried chicken. Yum.

Sunday, we weren't firing on all cylinders on Sunday. We skipped church. We went to the wrong restaurant for the race. When we went to the right restaurant, we were late so we didn't get to eat. And, then we headed out to the ball game. Fortunately, things seemed to be going better. We enjoyed a good game and P made it home awake.

We had some hiccups Sunday night in discussing our wills and stuff. But, I refuse to let that mar what would have been a perfect end to a wonderful weekend with Mr. mouse and P.

In fact, I'll skip ahead to going to bed. We found a mountain of stuffed animals on the bed when we went upstairs to our room. Apparently P had hidden them all there to keep them safe from ghosts. That explains the empty bins in her room. Too funny.


Cheers!
mouse

Staycation 2013?

Dear Friends and Family,

After laming out for Memorial Day, I griped about staying home for 4th of July. But, honestly, there's so much going on here, I'm tempted to lame out and stay home for the long weekend. If we can round out a few more activities, I think I could be tempted to stay home.

I just don't want to sleep the four day weekend away.


Cheers!
mouse

P and Her Rocks

Dear Friends and Family,

Want to hear about classic over thinking?

P picks up lots of rocks at school and gives them to Mr. mouse and me as presents. She says the most endearing things when she gives them to us. "Mommy, this is a special present just for you because I love you so much," would be a typical phrase that accompanies a small rock from her playground.

If it's the thought that counts, each rock is worth more than winning the lottery. It's a token of love from my one and only daughter.

Or, it may that P is play acting just like she is play acting when she pretends to be an astronaut or a firefighter.

Or, it may be that P doesn't have any other gifts she can give. She doesn't have money to buy gifts. Is stealing rocks from the playground acceptable? Or does that just lead to stealing in general? Is it really stealing if she knows that the majority of rocks go in a plastic bag and go back to school once we have too many of them at home?

See? Over thinking.

I will save some of the rocks with the quotes that accompanied them. I will assume that the sentiment is sometimes real and sometimes play acting. I will return most of the rocks to school so the children will have more rocks to gift next summer. I will assume this does not lead to stealing in general. We'll cross that bridge when we get there. For now, I will continue to savor each gift as if I won the lottery, because in a sense I did.

I have a small window of time to enjoy a very precious love - at some point P will not be as generous with her hugs and kisses and gifts. I'm glad she still is, for now.


Cheers!
mouse

07.01.13: Happy Second Half the Year, Everyone

Dear Friends and Family,

In true mouse fashion, I slept a good piece of Saturday. I hope this doesn't mean my thyroid is still hypothyroid. Because if it is, that might mean a lifetime of medication which will make me a little sad.

We went to a friend's birthday party Saturday night. And, that was Saturday.

Sunday, we went to church. Then, to see the race. And, then, we had a plethora of options. We gave P the option of going to a festival to learn about butter and cheese. We gave her the option of going to a carnival to ride more rides. And, we gave her the option of going to the zoo.

She picked the zoo. Unfortunately, zoo #1 was packed with people coming to see some entertainers. So we went to zoo #2. Zoo #2 is smaller, but it was worth it to skip the mobs of kids.

We went for a long walk after the zoo and ate dinner along the way. When we asked P what the highlight of her day was, she said it was riding the zoo train. Mr. mouse's was finding a good parking spot. Mine was seeing my favorite driver in second place, although I later learned he finished fifth. Or, maybe mine was waking from nap to see sand and a blue lake. I finally decided mine was hearing P's voice at the bottom of the stairs when she woke up and came downstairs.

Life is good.


Cheers!
mouse

Clutter, Clutter, Everywhere

Dear Friends and Family,

Now that my night stand is clean, I've been tackling the dresser on Mr. mouse's side of the bed.

When I look at our house, I see little piles of clutter everywhere. In a pinch, I can tune it out. But, honestly, it drives me crazy. I'm wondering, does it not bother Mr. mouse?

He's in for a rude awakening. My first two areas of focus when I take time off this fall will be my weight and the clutter in the house. I'm super excited. I'm wondering if he'll be less so.

Speaking of which, one more week down. Five weeks to go until I give notice.


Cheers!
mouse

9 AM, F5, F5, F5

Dear Friends and Family,

I'll admit it. Yesterday morning, I was anxiously awaiting the SCOTUS opinions.

Really? Really.

I wanted to know if the country was headed in a direction I agreed with or if I would be disappointed in the direction. Fortunately, I was happy, not thrilled, but happy.

I wonder if a point will come in the future when we can't imagine life today, when we can't imagine going back. I think a right is truly ingrained when we take it for granted. We move on because it's a non-issue. I'm not thrilled beyond belief every time Mr. mouse and I go to vote and I exercise my right to vote. I'm not thrilled beyond belief that I can speak my mind and write my mind and not worry about the recriminations. I'm not thrilled beyond belief that I can choose my church or choose no church. I take those rights, frankly, for granted.

I hope, one day in the future, I will be thrilled beyond belief. Then, I hope, one day in the future, I'll take it so for granted, I won't be thrilled. And, when that day comes, will be the day marriage equality has truly arrived for me. Is that odd?


Cheers!
mouse

Impulse Cleaning

Dear Friends and Family,

I got tired of looking at my nightstand covered in stuff.

There were random cords to charge random devices. There were cards and stickers. There was a Kindle stacked on top of two library books. There was a bow and plastic airplane from Christmas. There was a plant and an alarm clock and a rubber band. There were three things of lotion. Oh, and a set of hanging things for P's growth chart.

And, I kept thinking how nice it would be when I had time to organize it all. Then, I decided there's no time like the present. So, I cleared away all of the junk and now my nightstand is a thing of beauty. There's my alarm clock, a plant my friend B gave me, and my Kindle. Nothing else.

I get a little happy every time I look at it.


Cheers!
mouse

Files, Files, a Kingdom for My Files

Dear Friends and Family,

After discussing our file storage and backup system with our friends in Montreal, we came home to a dead drive. I won't say I wasn't concerned because I was. I won't say I was panicked because I wasn't.

We replaced the power supply. We replaced the chassis. We bought a secondary back up drive. And, it just finished backing up. Mr. mouse will be taking that one into the office and storing it there. It's the easiest way to get some redundancy. There's some physical space between the drives. There's some security at the office. There's some small chance something could happen simultaneously to both drives, but it's certainly less than if we keep drives at home.

Now, it's on to replacing a bad disk drive and to finding a cloud storage solution. That should get us to more safe than most people in the country. I'm thinking of breaking our cloud storage needs into three buckets. There's our photos, immensely valuable, very large, of no real importance to anyone but us so lower theft risk. There's our music, immensely complicated, but commodity products. Then, there's our data. Small, valuable, with some theft risk.

It might make sense to have three different solutions. It might not. We'll see.

For now, it just feels good to have a backup drive and access to my files.


Cheers!
mouse

06.24.13: Summer Days

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a most wonderful weekend.

Friday, we went to get mail. And, there was a package for P. It was a scooter from her grandparents. So, even if it was late when we got home, we let her put on her helmet and scoot around the courtyard a little bit before going to sleep.

Saturday, P took her scooter (with Mr. mouse) to get bagels for breakfast. Then, after setting up a USB drive to backup our data, we set off for the carnival.

P was so excited to see all of the rides. She watched the ferris wheel. She watched several of the grown up rides. There was the one that's shaped like a boat and swings pendulum style. There was the one that's like cars going out a wavy centrifuge. There was the one where you get in a cage and they spin you vertically.

She watched the kid rides. There was a relatively mild train ride. We asked her if she wanted to ride it and she said yes. Mr. mouse bought $20 worth of tickets. The rides were about $3 each.

She got on the train ride and watched and waved and smiled. We were so proud. Then, she got on the carousel. I went on with her. When the horse started moving, she asked me to let go of her so she could ride alone. Okay.

Then there was the ride like Dumbo's ride at Disney. And, she rode it without a hitch. Then there was the ride with cars where the cars fling out at the corners. And, she rode it without a hitch. Then there was the ride with hot air balloons where you spin as you ride in the air. And, she rode it without a hitch.

We bought 5 more tickets and I took P on the ferris wheel. And, then, she asked to ride more rides. We were so impressed we bought 9 more tickets and told her she could ride three more rides. She re-rode the Dumbo ride, the hot air balloon ride and the carousel. The funny thing was, she wanted to ride one of the grown up rides, but we told her she wasn't tall enough, so she picked the carousel for her last ride.

Then, she watched the games and asked if she could play one. We ponied up $6 for her to play a guaranteed win game where she had to fish for sharks. When she won, she wanted the sword which we vetoed. She picked a blue monkey instead. And, that, my friends, was our first carnival adventure with P. I went to the amusement park a lot growing up so it was extra special for me to see P enjoy it so much.

On our way home, she asked if we could go again on Sunday. We told her maybe next weekend, but not two days in a row. Sounds like P enjoyed it as much as I did.


Cheers!
mouse

Parent Association and Other Things in My Future

Dear Friends and Family,

I signed up for the Parent Association. We'll see what capacity I actually serve in. I want to make sure I stay involved in something even if I am not working. Volunteering seems as good an option as any. We'll see where it leads.

In the mean time, I need to get through another day of work to tick off another week as done on my list of things to do. And, on the home front, Mr. mouse and I are trying to figure out how to resurrect our hard drive that seems to have gotten rather unhappy in the last week. Wish us luck.


Cheers!
mouse

Work Just Needs to be Done

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Thursday. And, I made it through all of my tough meetings. I think. Honestly, I'll be so glad when work is done.

But, enough whining.

Mr. mouse is back from his trip. We have a pizza party this afternoon at P's new school. We have the weekend coming up. And, I had a great time with P last night. She asked to play Trouble. And, we worked on a new puzzle together.

Life is good. Work just needs to be done.


Cheers!
mouse

Hump Day

Dear Friends and Family,

I've decided to give three weeks notice which puts me at something like seven weeks left at work.

Here's to hoping I make it through today in one piece. Tomorrow I get to leave early for a pizza party and Fridays are mostly desk time. Today I've got multiple meetings I need to make it through.

Oh, and a bath for P.


Cheers!
mouse

Managed Chaos

Dear Friends and Family,

I need to sort out my head:

Tuesday

1. crazy hair day
2. bath

Wednesday

1. water day
2. Teacher present

Thursday

1. chips, salsa, guacamole
2. pizza party
3. bath

Friday

1. show and share
2. ice cream
3. breathe

Okay. Got it. Go.


Cheers!
mouse

06.17.13: Mad at Mr. mouse

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a good day Saturday. We had house cleaning in the morning. We drove out to the suburbs in the afternoon. We used a groupon for some pizza. We played at a park. We went to a friend's house for an evening party. We drove home.

We had a miserable day Sunday. We went to church. I twisted my ankle. Mr. mouse got mad. I got more mad.

From my perspective, he's being completely unreasonable. I didn't do it on purpose. Getting mad isn't going to untwist my ankle. It's not going to "ruin" our summer. And, even if it was, is that an excuse to act the way he's acting? No.

He's taught P some pretty awful lessons. Like, not keeping pace with someone who's injured. Like, not asking if someone's okay. Like, not trying to help when someone gets hurt. Like, getting angry over accidents. I could go on for a good long time with this list if you let me, but I won't.

Suffice it to say, I'm mad at Mr. mouse. And, I'm going to stay mad for a good long time.

Happy Father's Day to all the deserving father's out there. Too bad, we don't have one in the house.


Cheers!
mouse

Another Week Down

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday, I had a moment at work. There's a guy at work, let's call him Joe (names changed to protect the innocent).

Joe was on a rampage. And, when he gets on a rampage, he starts sending mean emails and making mean phone calls and calling people into his office and being mean. It's just not fun.

Fortunately, I don't report to Joe anymore. But, when Joe's on a rampage, he doesn't care. And, he fired off a note yesterday to me that would have normally gotten me worked up.

Fortunately, my new boss, let's call him Eddie (names changed to protect the innocent) stepped in and took control of the situation. I was honestly thinking of quitting yesterday, but, instead, I'm continuing on this unusual journey to August.

Thanks, Eddie.


Cheers!
mouse

2000 Posts Later

Dear Friends and Family,

First, the good news. My doctor told me I could stop taking my medication. I'm waiting for the lab numbers today. But, I'm not planning on taking medication today since my doctor told me I didn't need to. Now, I just need to keep my stress and my iodine intake under control.

Second, the slightly unbelievable. 2,000 posts. Really? Wow. Which begs the question, where was mouse 2,000 posts ago? I was getting ready to leave work. I was working on my house. I was focused on my health. Funny, 2,000 posts later, and life hasn't changed much.

I'm looking forward to my time off. Eight weeks can't come soon enough.


Cheers!
mouse

Doctor's Appointment, Fingers Crossed

Dear Friends and Family,

I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon. I'm really hoping I can be done with my thyroid medication.

I feel like I've slept the last six months and I still feel exhausted. I know there are people out there dealing with real illness, life or death illness, who would trade spots with me in a heartbeat. What's a little tired and fat compared to real pain and suffering? Nothing.

I should keep this all in perspective. And, because I have my doctor's appointment, I get to leave after lunch today. Making lemonade out of lemons.

Still hoping I can be done with my thyroid medication.


Cheers!
mouse

06.11.13: Bienvenue a Montreal

Dear Friends and Family,

Another year another fabulous race weekend in Montreal. I do love Montreal. We get to see fabulous friends. We get to watch a fabulous race. We get to eat fabulous food. And, we get to meet new people every year - our fabulous friends introduce us to their fabulous friends. See? How do you top that for a weekend?

Saturday, we went out to watch qualifying. It was cold, it was wet. But, we got to catch up with the people who get the seats behind us every year. We came back, cleaned a bunch of vegetable, grilled some fish and some steak and had dinner with our friends.

Sunday, race day, dawned sunny and bright. We had a picnic at the park. We watched the race. We let P run at the playground. We came back to dinner at the park with friends and wine.

Monday, we came home. I'm not looking forward to work today. It seems so trivial and petty. I'll be glad when I'm done.

Race weekend. So liberating and refreshing. I'm looking forward to when work is done.


Cheers!
mouse

Friday, Made it Through One More Week

Dear Friends and Family,

Made it through week 10. Next week will be week 9.

The sad part is there are parts of work I truly enjoy. There are people I will miss working with.

But, I am still excited about the time off.

I'm inspired to write a new top 3:

1. enjoying the remaining 9 weeks of work: I know that sounds counter-intuitive. But, I think I will. There's going to be a lot of change in the upcoming months. I know there will be days I miss work. I may as well enjoy the weeks I have remaining.
2. managing P's transition: There's stuff to do at her current school like the letter we need to send to let them know we're officially leaving. There's downloading all of her stuff from her current school portal. There's putting together something for her teacher's and the center to say thank you. Then, there's stuff to do for her new school like sending in forms and attending the welcome events.
3. estate plan: And, last, but not least, is using my free benefits to complete our estate plan.

I think that's our top three for the summer. A lot of things will change in the fall, but I think focusing on these three things will make the summer a bigger success.


Cheers!
mouse

52 Things Will Leave the Mouse Pad (Round 2) Update

Dear Friends and Family,

It's a new year. And, I'm beginning another round of my clutter diet. The goal? I am going to try and have 52 things meaningfully leave the mouse pad this year. It's a purposeful decision to remove something that has found a home in our home. I'm evicting unwanted tenants.

There's different questions different people use to gauge what should stay and what should go. There's do I still love it, does it serve a purpose, when did I last use it, etc. My guiding light question will be knowing what I know today, would I buy this today?

The List (most recent departures listed first):

1. I'm feeling a little guilty, but not guilty enough. I'm bringing a bag of stuffed animals in for a friend who just had twins. P got them as a gift, but we never put these in rotation, so they're new. All the stuff P got that we never used. I'm feeling a little guilty, but not guilty enough.
2. Change of plans, we brought some stuff down for P's cousin instead. There's a tower of stacking alphabet blocks.
3. Next is a small zoo Mr. mouse's folks got P for her second Christmas.
4. There's a bucket of blocks P got from my parents.
5. There's two puzzles. The first, Mr. mouse bought once when we were traveling. It's got four little puzzles each with four pieces. The second, we got as a birthday gift. There's only so many US state puzzles one kid needs.
6. And, last, but not least, an art kit for the bath. More stuff we got that we never used.
7. I've been sick for three days now and so I'm going to focus on something small for today. My friend Pete offered me $50 for my four year old crib and mattress. P's slept in it almost every night since she was three months old so we've gotten full usage out of it. It'll be a little sad, but she loves her big girl bed so I guess she's ready for the change.
8. We had a small refrigerator sitting on our landing. It used to be in Mr. mouse's office until they moved offices and sneaking a refrigerator in got too complicated. Then, we used it for parties on the deck, on occasion. However, it's latest use, gathering dust while sitting on our landing for the last four years, didn't seem like its best use. So, when we learned the nursery room that P stays in when I go to church needed a refrigerator, we dropped it off.
9. I'm writing about clutter because sometimes it's easier to focus on a small thing than to try and process a storm going on around you. And, I am truly getting rid of something so I have the slight endorphin rush from progress against clutter. This one is almost comical. I have 12 Disney coffee mugs I bought in 1994 so almost twenty years ago. Actually, I bought close to two dozen mugs, but donated a batch some years ago and kept only my favorites. The colors are them are really nice. The feel of them is really nice. I haven't used one ever. They're still new in box. I found a friend of a friend who has a car with a vanity plate of Disney Lover. I am going to give the last 12 mugs to her. I am still sad to have these mugs leave the house. I don't use them. They sit above my stove in the cabinet. They need to go. Would I buy them today? Possibly, if I came across them somewhere. The problem is, I don't think I'd come across them anywhere today. So, I guess I couldn't or rather I wouldn't buy them today. Be strong, mouse, let them go.
10. The next two are almost trivial. I almost feel guilty counting them. Yesterday, I went into a bin of light bulbs we had and I found a plant bulb from the pile of random bulbs that sit in our garage. I brought it into work and gave it to my friend who now uses it to light up the plant I gave her. (see below, second from bottom)
11. useful, just not for us: swim diapers
12. junk: old telephone and two routers
13. useful, just not for us: sandwich maker
14. junk: three plastic cups
15. useful, just not for us: bagel slicer
16. useful, just not for us: more aqua globes
17. useful, just not for us: two winter coats
18. baby gear: two baby gates
19. baby gear: three baby gates
20. books: five or more kid books
21. toys: two noise makers
22. toys: Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders
23. toys: elephant pull toy
24. toys: peg puzzle with farm animals
25. toys: two bags of blocks
26. useful, just not for us: house plant
27. useful, just not for us: exercise ball

The tally from 2012?

1. junk: 15
2. useful, just not for us: 14
3. toys: 11
4. baby gear: 7
5. odds and ends: 3
6. books: 2

We'll see if I can get to 52 this year. I'm cautiously optimistic.


Cheers!
mouse

Allergic to Chipotle

Dear Friends and Family,

If this were life before P, I would take today off and sleep and drink tea and go for a long walk. But, in my current life I will get ready for work, drop P off at school, and deal with it all.

Yesterday, I went out to Chipotle for lunch. Unfortunately, I think they must have switched their cooking oil because I felt that so familiar heart racing sensation all afternoon and into the evening. Today, I feel like sh!t. Am I allowed to say that? Well, I think I just did.

Sleep. Tea. A long walk. It sounds so therapeutic. Perhaps I'll do that in a couple of months after I leave work. I'll have all the time in the world for sleep, tea, and a long walk.


Cheers!
mouse

Highlight for the Week? Visit with the School Nurse on Thursday

Dear Friends and Family,

We've got a visit with the school nurse on Thursday to talk about P's health before she enters school in the fall. I wish the school allowed us to pack our own lunch. But, for some odd reason, they don't. It's school lunch for all of the kids.

On the one hand, it'll give P chance to eat things she wouldn't normally eat at home which might be a good thing. But, on the other hand, some of it might not be as healthy. Plus, I'm afraid of how the transition will go. What if she hates the lunch and begins to hate the school because of it?

She's got a lot of change coming up. We'll have to work through all of it with her. Hopefully she enjoys it.


Cheers!
mouse

06.03.13: June, Glorious June, Honey, Can You Turn the Heat on? I'm Cold

Dear Friends and Family,

Another cold, wet weekend. It started out promising on Saturday. We went to the library and to the salon. We packed a picnic and headed out to the zoo with the free admission pass we scored at the library.

We looked at the big cats. We ate our lunch. We headed in to see the monkeys. P loved watching the gibbons. They were walking around, swinging around, and just being active and comical. She also liked the orangutans. The zoo keeper was feeding them grapes. The gorillas were napping.

We opened the door back out and found ourselves in the middle of a passing shower. Fortunately, we had umbrellas. We walked by the giraffes because they're P's favorite zoo animal. And, we walked by the polar bears because apparently they're also a favorite animal.

The polar bear couldn't have been more picture perfect. Beautifully framed, hanging out by the water's edge, we could have stared at it all day. But, since it was getting late, we walked by the camels and headed out to the car.

Unfortunately, we got hit by a second shower right when we got to the car and got hit with buckets of water. But, we made it home in one piece.

Sunday, we went to church. Then, we came home and picked up coats, gloves, bike and helmet before heading out to the park. P played in an empty park and then went for a bike ride.

She had her first fall halfway through the ride. We stopped for lemonade which turned into lunch. Then, we rode back to the car. She had a second spill right before the car. Those inclined corners can be tricky.

P and I napped in the car while Mr. mouse ran errands.

The rest of the weekend was spend playing Dr. Mommy Mouse (P) and (insert name here) Jane (me). I got cold Sunday night, so I grabbed my blanket and my pillow and headed to P's room. It was much warmer in there.


Cheers!
mouse

10 Weeks and a Day

Dear Friends and Family,

It's getting real. Ten weeks left and each week seems to have something to look forward to.

I was thinking some more about this this morning. I'm excited about little things like getting our house in order. I would love a house that is in order again. I had it in my apartment in 1994. I'd love to have it in my house in 2014. It'll take work, but I'm truly excited about the thought of it. I'm also excited about spending time cooking. I know you must be so tired of listening to me. Well, I hate to warn you, I've probably got 10 more weeks of this.

I know! Be excited for me.


Cheers!
mouse

PS: We went to a school event for P's new school yesterday. All of the people seemed normal. That felt good.

Life Lessons

Dear Friends and Family,

I wonder what happens when parents don't teach their children. Then, when the children become parents, they can't teach their children. And, when those children become parents... Well, the cycle just perpetuates. Until, something breaks the cycle, right?

My parents never taught me the first thing about money. I knew you needed to work to earn money to spend, but that was about it. My first boss and the colleagues at my first job taught me about money. I hope to teach P about putting together a budget and living within her means and saving for retirement and all of the things I learned through fortuitous luck.

My parents never taught me about nutrition. They were immigrants coming from a childhood of war. Food was hard earned. Calories were a blessing. Obesity was unheard of. A little bit of plump was a sign of wealth. Fast forward several decades to this land of plenty, and I needed to spend a lot of time learning about nutrition. P's decent with her fruit. She's pretty poor with her vegetables. She's great with her milk. I hope to teach her about nutrition and more importantly about cooking. My parents never had time to cook. We've turned into people who never have time to cook. Once I leave work, I'm looking forward to having time to cook.

I'm sure there are more lessons to be taught and learned. But, just thinking about my own childhood, those are two I want to pass on to P.


Cheers!
mouse

Perhaps I Should Quit Now

Dear Friends and Family,

I feel like 2013 will be another one of those waiting years. We're already well into 2013. I'm slowly, or not slowly, winding or not winding my way down at work. By the time P starts school, it'll be September which means the year will be winding down as well.

Tomorrow night I get to gauge my progress against retirement savings. Perhaps that'll cheer me up. Okay, now, that's just weird.


Cheers!
mouse

05.28.13: Soggy and Cold Memorial Day Weekend

Dear Friends and Family,

Saturday, I slept until 11:30 in the morning. It felt fabulous.

Then, we went to back to back birthday parties. The first for one of P's friends, the second for one of P's friend's mom. Both were tons of fun. Both were outdoors. The only thing not cooperating was the weather. It was cold and wet. But, we managed to stay dry and enjoy ourselves.

Sunday, I went to church. We watched F1 Monaco. Um. I don't remember where the rest of the day went.

Monday, we went to the museum and played with corn and saw the Ancient Egypt exhibit. We packed a picnic lunch and saved money and ate healthier. I like spending time with P. She was pretty sad last night. She wanted more stay at home days. At some point I will be able to tell her that she'll have lots of stay at home time in the future. But, I haven't told her yet.

We spent a lot of time on Sunday and Monday reenacting parts of the party. P play acted the pinata scene with some streamers and a roll of wrapping paper. She play acted grabbing all of the candy with some pimmels (packing material) we got in a package. She play acted the blindfolded pin the tail on the donkey and even let us spin her. I think these things let her internalize her experience so that it's not all foreign when she encounters it again at another party.

It was just too much fun.


Cheers!
mouse

Friday, Glorious Friday

Dear Friends and Family,

I think once I'm not working, I'm going to spend a lot more time doing purposeful stuff. And, sadly, it's not because work takes up so much time. It's that I spend so much time driving. And, driving takes up so much energy.

I'm looking forward to eating breakfast on the kitchen island. It'll be the same breakfast I eat today. But, it'll still be different. Instead of eating it out of an Tupperware container with a spare fork, I can eat it out of a beautiful glass bowl with one of our real forks. Instead of eating in an institutional cubicle, I can eat in a beautiful home. Instead of reading emails, I can read a book. See? So much better.

I'm going to be very deliberate about my habits. I think I'll come home from school drop-off, load the washer, unload the dishwasher, and then have breakfast. That way, I'll already be mentally "started" on my day when I'm done with breakfast. And, I'll have reinforced to myself that food isn't the first priority, it's something to be enjoyed it its own due time.

And, after breakfast? Um. Give me a bit to think about that. I'll think of something in the next eleven weeks.


Cheers!
mouse

Thursday, Yeah!

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday, I gave yesterday my all.

Today, I'll give today my all.

Tomorrow, I will give tomorrow my all.

Then, it'll be the weekend and I'll be coming back to a short week. And, that'll be eleven weeks left, but who's counting?


Cheers!
mouse

Wednesday, Hump Day

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Wednesday.

If I get through today, then the weekend is one day closer.

My day today is packed with meetings. I wish I had more desk time to actually get things done.

Then, again, why do I care?

I care because I still have 12 weeks left which means I need to keep my head in the game. I care because I want to leave on good terms. I care because I take personal pride in what I do. I care because anything can happen and I want my flexibility.

Mouse is not a coaster. Do, or do not. There is no try.

Time to get ready for work.


Cheers!
mouse

Twelve Weeks and Counting

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Tuesday.

Work is getting interesting to watch. There's a smell of panic in the air and more and more of our moves smell of desperation. If I were an engaged employee, I'd be looking for the life boat right about now. But, I'm not, so I'm not. I'm perfectly willing to stay the course for some number of weeks and then leave.

Interestingly, several recruiters are beginning to reach out about positions. I'm curious enough about the local ones to consider the conversation. The ones that require relocation have a higher bar. We'd have to relocate the family which now involves uprooting Mr. mouse and his work and uprooting P and her school. It'd be nice if schools had reciprocal relationships with other schools. Then, moving would be easier. But, I suppose getting into school if your child isn't in would get even more difficult. Scratch that.

I'm curious to see what today will bring. We take ditch to ditch driving to a new level.


Cheers!
mouse

05.20.13: Birthdays, Check

Dear Friends and Family,

We flew down for my nephew's first birthday. P had fun going to the beach, coloring a piggy bank, and playing with my mom and brother. I had a good time catching up with my sister. We avoided the intervention with my brother because out of nowhere my mom claims that money is not a problem.

Sigh.

My sister decorated the house to a tee. She cooked up a storm. She made butter cream transfers by hand. And, outside of family, only three people came to the party. Two people stopped by for about 15 minutes at the beginning. And, after they left, one person came for about an hour. Both from my brother-in-law's work.

I think my sister needs to develop a network. She needs people to relate to. I'd get serious cabin fever in the same situation. I've strongly encouraged day care. Perhaps I should have strongly encouraged the ones where the parents stay with the kids so that she can meet other caregivers.

Still, it was great seeing my nephew and my sister and my brother-in-law and his parents and my brother. My mom was there too, but since we had her for a week alone, that didn't feel like as much of a treat.


Cheers!
mouse

Our Money

Dear Friends and Family,

Last night I realized how fortunate I am. My sister and her husband have a very different money dynamic than Mr. mouse and I do. She stays home to take care of my nephew and to keep the house from falling apart. Her husband works. In their household she defers to him on money decisions. Right, wrong, or indifferent, that's the dynamic they've fallen into.

Perhaps it's because we've been together for so long I can't imagine trying to figure out my money from our money. Perhaps it's because we both came in with roughly the same situation, he had more credit card debt, I had more student loans, but it seemed close enough for us. Perhaps it's because I've worked as hard as Mr. mouse had and I've contributed financially to the pool. Perhaps it's because I'm me and Mr. mouse is Mr. mouse and we just have a different dynamic, but it would never occur to me to defer to Mr. mouse on money decisions. It would be a foreign concept for us. I think.

Because, we do defer to each other. We don't make decisions in isolation. Like, I discussed leaving work and taking time off with Mr. mouse, made sure we were both okay with that decision. I discussed starting a new business and made sure we were both okay with that decision. It's not like I need his permission, it's just that I would expect the same if the tables were turned.

Perhaps that's it. Perhaps it's coming across as deferral, but it's a joint decision on my sister's part too. I hope so. I like feeling like the money decision making authority in our family is split evenly.


Cheers!
mouse

One Small Step

Dear Friends and Family,

I think I may be turning into a conservative. I'm still for marriage equality. I'm still pro-choice and anti-gun, but I'm beginning to feel like I'm a little more conservative than I was even a couple of days ago.

I'm don't know where you draw the line in the sand about at-fault and not-at-fault. I'm okay with not-at-fault people getting aid, temporary aid or even permanent aid. I'm beginning to be not okay with not-at-fault people getting aid. Why should I need to work my duff off to help someone who isn't willing to help themselves? Not at fault? I'm willing to chip in. That's being humane.

It's a fuzzy line, but one I'm beginning to think more about. And, it all started with my mom saying she's getting a job to support my brother. After much conversation with my sister and with Mr. mouse I landed on the fact that I'm okay with my mom getting a job if that's the choice she makes. I'd prefer for her to kick my brother out, but if she can't, then it should be her free choice to get a job to support him if she wants to. I shouldn't judge her for her choice. Nor should I feel like I need to contribute to a bad situation and enable it further. This is their decision to make - my mother's and my brother's, not mine nor my sister's.

But, it leads to more questions. Why isn't my brother able to work? He's 33. He's in good health. He can claim he's a student, and that he works in the hospital during some portion of the year. But, why can't he work during the rest of the time? Are there no jobs? None at all? Or it is something else? I feel like it's something else.

My sister told me she's offered to help him become an x-ray tech. It pays good money. But, apparently, it isn't prestigious enough for my brother. And, apparently, living at home off of mom and dad is? It's twisted logic at best. And, why can't he get a job, some job, any job, even if it's a sad job that pays minimum wage? Why can't he get that job? If there's zero jobs to be had, then, I guess my perspective would be different. But, I know there are jobs. I just believe there are jobs. There must be jobs, if only he were willing to look and to take one.

Then, there's the question of the mountain of debt he's taken on in pursuing his dream. How's he going to pay that off? Those student loans would wipe out most of my parents' savings and I'm certainly not willing to take them on. I feel like my brother should be a functioning member of society and needs to take some personal responsibility for his actions. If he can't, then I don't feel like, we, as a society, owe him. Do we owe him shelter or food or medicine? I'm not sure. It sounds cruel, but I'm just not sure anymore.

Time for more navel gazing.


Cheers!
mouse

PS: I also am beginning to think not-at-fault people should give up some rights to receive permanent aid. I'm not sure how or why, but I'm beginning to think that way.

Who's to Blame? And, More Importantly, What Do We Do Now?

Dear Friends and Family,

My mom's thinking about getting a job. When she first told me that she said it was to get out of the house because she needs some space from my father. Then she told me it's also to make ends meet. Then she told me that it's tough to make ends meet with my brother still living at home.

Who's to blame when children fall short of expectations? Is it the parents fault for poor parenting? Is it ultimately the kid's fault once they're an adult? I'm not sure. All I know is that my 33 year old brother isn't pulling his weight. My mom is seriously contemplating getting a job because he lives at home.

Now, I can come up with a million and one reasons why my 33 year old brother lives at home. My parents aren't good parents. He never learned how to be a functioning adult. But, then, my sister and I turned out okay. My brother's in med school, but he's been in and out of school for what seems like forever. He's waiting to next March to match. Was it his fault he didn't match last spring? Or was it bad luck? Am I losing patience right when the end is in sight? Or is this one more year on a train to nowhere? How do I feel when my mom says things like he's just like your dad?

Most importantly, can I really let my parents be short of money? Should I let my mother get a job? If it were really just to get out of the house, I'd be all for it. But, if it's really just to make ends meet, then I'm not sure I'm for it. Should P go to private school ahead of my mother having food on the table? The answer seems like it should be no. Should I "retire" and take some time off ahead of my mother having food on the table? The answer seems like it should be no.

But, then, I ask myself, should P not go to private school after our crazy year of getting her into school so that my 33 year old brother can slough off? The answer seems like it should be no. Should I work and let me health teeter in the balance and let me house fall slowly apart and have no time for myself so that my 33 year old brother can slough off? The answer seems like it should be no.

Should my mother work because my brother won't? That answer isn't so simple. On the one hand, I can argue it's her call to make. She can kick him out and live off of the savings they have. Or she can get a job and be okay with him living at home. I can ignore the situation under the guise of they're all adults, they can make adult decisions.

But, they're not. Outside of my sister and me, they're not all adults. They're like kids. And, who's to blame? And, more importantly, what do we do now?

I think my brother should get a job. I think he should begin to pay my parents rent and begin to cover some of the expenses associated with living at home. Rent. That's a good place to start. And, perhaps a third of the grocery bill. And, then perhaps a third of the utilities. But, I'm getting ahead of myself. Rent. That's a good place to start.

I shouldn't have to work because my brother can't. Or more importantly, my brother won't. Right? I shouldn't feel guilty about my decisions. I've worked hard. I hate to sound entitled but I feel like I've earned my right to balance my work and my life.

If only my brother weren't completely lame. Who's to blame? And, what do we do now? Hopefully so navel gazing will provide some insight.


Cheers!
mouse

Bus Day

Dear Friends and Family,

Oops. Running behind. Gotta run. I get to take the bus today.


Cheers!
mouse

05.13.13: Happy Birthday, P!

Dear Friends and Family,

Saturday was the big day - P's fourth birthday party. And, while there were a couple of moments when I thought it was going to fall apart, overall, it went without a hitch. Kids were entertained. Parents were entertained. Everyone was fed. Cake was eaten. Venue was paid.

Having a station wagon was nice. Having my mom here to help was even nicer. P was super excited about turning four. I was a little sad to see my three-year-old turn four, but I put on a brave face for her. It's just that I don't want to wake up one day and wonder where the years have gone.

Sunday I went to church with my mom. We went out for pizza afterwards. And, then we stopped by a church for some quick pictures and a park to let P run around. By two o'clock we were home and I slept for four hours. It felt so good to sleep.

Mr. mouse cooked dinner. We did hand and foot prints for P. And, wrapped up the evening reading stories in bed. All in all, a great weekend.

Now that that's all behind us, time to focus. Time to get cracking on the legal stuff. First off, I need to compile a list of what I need. Then we need to find a lawyer. Time to get cracking.


Cheers!
mouse

PS: I twisted my ankle last night, but that's just between you and me.

Resilient mouse

Dear Friends and Family,

I think I learned a lot yesterday.

I took the bus and the train. It was a lot less tiring than driving. I learned that my commute is taking a toll on me and I will be glad when I know longer have to drive to work every day.

One of our management team members called me on the phone and chewed me out over something that is outside of my control. I could, if I were invested enough in my work, move mountains to try and appease him. I learned that I am just not that invested in my work.

The business isn't going well. They're (see, not we, not invested) are scrambling to make the numbers. I learned that the fire drills are only going to continue and they'll probably get worse before they get better, if they ever get better. I'm doubtful they'll ever get better.

What does that all add up to?

I don't like driving to work. Theoretically I could take the bus and train to work once P is in school. But, I'm tired of the fire drills that consume my days and I'm tired of getting chewed out over things that are not my fault.

It's time to leave, mouse. It's only a matter of when. Sometime between now and Labor Day I will give notice. What I do next is something I need to solve for. But, it will not be what I am doing now.


Cheers!
mouse

The Plan

Dear Friends and Family,

Sleep on the train. Do emails like crazy on the bus. Walk like a zombie through my meetings. Do more frenetic emails at lunch. More zombie trance through the afternoon meetings. Set up my out of office. Relax on the way home. Too bad I forgot to download a book or a movie last night.

It'll be good to be off tomorrow.


Cheers!
mouse

May the Birthday Celebrations Begin!

Dear Friends and Family,

My mom arrives today. And, if I make it through today and tomorrow, the work week is behind me. Teacher Appreciation cards are filled out, warm and fuzzies are made.

It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas birthday everywhere I go...

And, if I make it through today and tomorrow, I'll be down to 13 weeks of work. Hurray!


Cheers!
mouse

Alive

Dear Friends and Family,

Today's the presentation. I'm alive. I'm looking forward to a good night's sleep tonight.

My mom flies in tomorrow, assuming everything goes to plan. And, we can begin to enjoy life again. I'm peeved work has robbed me of the past week. I'm glad it's behind me.

I'll be glad when it's all behind me.


Cheers!
mouse

05.06.13: Work Filled Weekend

Dear Friends and Family,

It's Monday. Wow. Did the weekend go ever quickly.

Saturday, we had a haircut followed by a show at the Symphony followed by lunch followed by a birthday party followed by mattress shopping followed by dinner. And, I wonder why the day went quickly.

Sunday, we went to church. Then, I napped and P napped. And, then I worked through the evening. Seriously, I worked through the evening on a presentation for a job I know I will be quitting in the very foreseeable future.

There's nothing worse than giving 100% to something you're not 100% committed to. I'm sure there is. But, it requires a level of discipline and will power that only comes with experience powering through things that must be done even if they're unpleasant.

Fortunately, I know there's an end in sight to the recent long hours. We have a presentation tomorrow. After that life should return to normal. So, at most, I should have 24 hours more of this.

On the good news front, my doctor reduced my medication. I'm back on 1 pill once a day. I'm super focused on not letting my symptoms flare. I have an appointment in six weeks. I would LOVE if I could get off the medication at that appointment.

So, here's a top three update.

1. my health: I'm not going to let anything get to me in the next six weeks. I'm not going to let anything get to me in the next six weeks. I'm not going to let anything get to me in the next six weeks. I'm not going to let anything get to me in the next six weeks. I'm going to continue with my probiotics, medication, Omega three caplets, calcium tablets, and multi-vitamis. And, I'm not going to let anything get to me in the next six weeks.
2. I'm going to enjoy the upcoming weekends. We have P's birthday party. We have my nephew's birthday party. We have plans with friends from college. We have F1 racing. All fun things. I'm looking forward to the unofficial start of our summer. Last year, this all got convoluted with a trip to Hong Kong. This year, I'm hoping for a chance to enjoy the slow weekends with friends.
3. will/trust: The one thing left to do before I leave work. Not something for this week, but perhaps after all of the birthday festivities are done with, this is something we can kick off.

Okay. Time to get ready for work.


Cheers!
mouse

Friday on Three Hours Sleep, Two Nights in a Row

Dear Friends and Family,

Well, I asked for an epiphany yesterday and I think I got one.

The traffic was miserable. P was miserable. I was exhausted. I found out there's a leadership workshop kicking off that my managers either didn't bother nominating me for or didn't think I was ready for. And, putting it all together with my promised raise not coming through left me in a terrible mood by the time I got home.

What does all that add up to? It means I have 14 weeks left at work after today. It also means I need to get busy with estate planning and stuff between now and 14 weeks from now since I have legal coverage at work that makes that kind of stuff free. I like free.

Somehow, I think when I go to quit, there's going to be a lot of drama. I know there's no one else in the company that can do what I do. I would like it if they respect my decision and let me leave without a bunch of drama. I'd hate it if that's when they wake up and appreciate me. I just don't like those kinds of relationships.

I don't like it personally. I don't like it professionally. 14 and counting.


Cheers!
mouse

PS: I reserve the right to change my mind at least a dozen times between now and Labor Day - which means yesterday was helpful, but not an epiphany. Sigh.

Waiting for an Epiphany

Dear Friends and Family,

Work. Work. Work.

I'm so conflicted. I enjoy my work. I enjoy the people I work with. I get paid good money for what I do and the hours I work.

On the other hand, the company is in shambles. It's a million and one miles from my house. I really want to spend some more time with P once she's in school in September. I really want to spend time on my idea. But, at the same time I'm afraid it won't work.

Um. Can I have my cake and eat it too and have a piece on the side for later?

I guess I still have 14 or so weeks to make some sort of decision. I'm hoping some small light bulb will go off and make the decision obvious. Do you hear me universe? A light bulb would be most helpful! Okay, thanks.


Cheers!
mouse

Crossing Out To Dos and Trying Not to Feel Guilty about It

Dear Friends and Family,

I know I'm a basket case. But, here's the thing. Once I put something on my to do list, I hate crossing it out unless it's done. After all, some logic tells me that I put it on the list for a reason. But, then, other logic tells me life has changed and priorities have changed.

For example, I have on my list dental insurance. I had a new retainer made last year in August when my bottom retainer broke. I had a new retainer made in February when my top retainer broke. I filed for insurance because this orthodontist doesn't file on your behalf and my August claim got returned for missing paperwork. Theoretically, I should dig through the paperwork and figure out what is missing and re-file and then file the February claim. After all, this is real money, right?

Truth be told, just the thought of it all makes me want to curl up in a ball and pretend the world around me doesn't exist. Honestly, there's so much more I want to do with my free time like finishing P's baby journal or organizing the kitchen cabinets or playing with P or going for a walk or thinking of healthier lunch options or really just about anything.

I could hate my way through it or I can just be okay with the fact that I'm just not going to bother. I have my retainer. The orthodontist has his money. Nobody gets hurt. Nothing is illegal. I'll just need to find a new orthodontist when it comes time to do any other teeth work - one that files insurance on your behalf.


Cheers!
mouse