We Miss You

Dear Kayla,

I remember a year ago today started out as the most ordinary of ordinary days. I had my morning tea and breakfast and headed out to work. It was a slow day at work and I came home early. I was going to meet up with Frenchie after dinner to learn how to do a home pedicure.

I know for you it was a very different story. To say that we miss you is such an inadequate understatement. 365 days have passed during which we've had good days, bad days, easy days and very hard days. Today will be one of the hardest days for everyone.

I was very close with my grandfather and I remember after my grandfather passed away, the first year was the hardest. There were all of the holidays and occasions where his absence left a huge void. And, I remembered with a flood of memories all of the good times we had had together. I remember seeing a man on a train in Boston who reminded me of him and the tears just started flowing.

It's been almost six years since he passed away and the hardest part now is not being able to share all of life's high points with him. I wish he was hear today so I could tell him about life in Chicago, about my new job, about new successes with Weight Watchers, about the fun weekend we had with friends, about my parents coming to visit, about our last New Year's Party, about everything.

And while it was hard to cope with my loss, I had two things going for me, one is that he was very old when he passed away and had led a full life. I had almost thirty years with him and recognized than most grandchildren don't get that. The other is that since he was very old, I knew he was satisfied with all that he had accomplished in life. He had years in front of him, but more behind him. And, I knew he was okay with it.

So, in the end, my words are very simple. We miss you more than words can say. It's been a tough year without you.


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